You're not gonna believe this but, the woman sitting next to me is not using an Apple computer. What do you think I should do? One can only assume that the manager of this cafe would want to know. Maybe I should pretend I have to take a crap so I can ask the manager for the key to the crapper and then tell him that he has someone in his cafe who he should be actively discriminating against. Maybe he'll be relieved to know that not all the whistle blowers of the world have gone limp in the last week. Maybe he'll give me a free coffee in return.
Oh, and speaking of stories about people who sympathize with whistle blowers and as such better start watching their back, have you ever heard of Ron Paul? Even though I know you rely on me for pretty much everything you need explained to you, I have to admit that I don't know a lot about Ron Paul except that he is a member of The House Of Representatives, representing the State of Texas and if I know anything about congress, I know that The House Of Representatives is kinda of like being a senior in High School but still playing point guard for the Junior Varsity basketball team. You're just not getting to second base with Julie Anderson. Nope, not even if your dad let's you borrow his Corvette for that date to the mall. In fact, that might actually lessen your chances. Unless you live in a suburb of Hartford, Deerfield, St. Paul or Tampa. Anyway, sorry to have been mixing metaphors. You'll have to excuse me. It's been a long morning. For starters, it would appear that that stalwart of breakfast cuisine, Morir Sonando ...
... is closed? What? I know. I tried calling Mayor Bloomberg but his line was busy, or something. Who the hell is he talking to all the time? Doesn't he know I've got real problems. I mean, I spent about 17 seconds walking around the block to the next counter-seat-only Dominican diner in the greater Broadway and Marcy arena of Brooklyn to get my requisite high fructose corn syrup enhanced fuel for under $5.00. And then of course when I got this place to tell you all about Ron Paul, there was the girl here with the computer that wasn't an Apple. Luckily for all of us, she was duly marginalized, quietly accepted her station in life, and left.
Anyway, Ron Paul hates America and supports terrorism. To wit, feast your freedom loving eyes on his recent manifesto of submission as presented in the form of an aurally delivered questionnaire to the other members of Congress:
"Number 1: Do the America People deserve know the truth regarding the ongoing wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan and Yemen?
Number 2: Could a larger question be how can an army private access so much secret information?
Number 3: Why is the hostility mostly directed at Assange, the publisher, and not at our governments failure to protect classified information?
Number 4: Are we getting our moneys worth of the 80 Billion dollars per year spent on intelligence gathering?
Number 5: Which has resulted in the greatest number of deaths: lying us into war or Wikileaks revelations or the release of the Pentagon Papers?
Number 6: If Assange can be convicted of a crime for publishing information that he did not steal, what does this say about the future of the first amendment and the independence of the internet?
Number 7: Could it be that the real reason for the near universal attacks on Wikileaks is more about secretly maintaining a seriously flawed foreign policy of empire than it is about national security?
Number 8: Is there not a huge difference between releasing secret information to help the enemy in a time of declared war, which is treason, and the releasing of information to expose our government lies that promote secret wars, death and corruption?
Number 9: Was it not once considered patriotic to stand up to our government when it is wrong?"
Which of course reminds me that the conspicuous silence of the "Eric Clapton Camp" regarding an invitation to perform a goodwill concert in North Korea can only be a sign of said bluesman's latent terrorist sympathies.
Oh, and speaking of people who may or not belong in the greatest country in the history of countries where 90% of caucasian television pundits need a remedial math class, I'll be performing with not one but two, count 'em, two foreigners tonight at Rockwood Music Hall. That's right kids, Emerald Isledian Andy Fitzpatrick leads his band of handsomeness tonight at 10pm with the very Italian Andrea Long on something he calls chitarra. Don't forget... Immigracion is always just a phone call away.
Finally, if you're like me, or wish you were like me, or just like hearing about things that people like me like, you'll also be happy to know that one of my secret admirer's continues to hold fast to her rightful place among the also ran's for 2010. Whew.
In the meantime, I have to go now ad do some New Year's Eve preparation busy work for slave driver Queen Mother Feather.
Mwah!
M
P.S. Don't forget to do your holiday shopping at amazon.com via the convenient link to amazon.com located in the bottom right margin of this page.
P.P.S. Don't forget to make other plans for Thursday night.
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